God's Design for Sexuality

Sermon Transcript

Let's go before the Lord and let's pray so we can be ready to receive what he has for us from his word. So, Lord, we just come before your throne. We just thank you for your living and active word. We thank you that you are the living and active word. And that, Lord, when your word is proclaimed, you have a word for us.

So, Lord, today we just prepare our hearts before you. Lord, if there's any known sin in our life, we confess that before you, knowing that you promised to forgive our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness. Lord, we pray against any distractions that might be going on or other things that we're thinking about so we can focus clearly on your word. Lord, we want to hear you. We want to align ourselves with you.

We want you to get all the glory, honor and praise from our lives. And so, Lord, if there's any place where we're out of alignment, we pray that you would use your word to correct us, encourage us, admonish us, and put us right back in place so we can continue our walk with you. And, Lord, for what you're going to do in advance, we give you all the glory, honor and praise. We thank you that we can hear your word this morning. And all God's people that were ready to receive his word said very loudly with me.

Amen. Amen. I want to encourage you this morning, open up your bibles to first Corinthians, chapter six. First Corinthians, chapter six. And as we're in this series called stronger, really what we're talking about is how to live a godly life in a godless culture.

And for this series, we've been looking at the book of first Corinthians, and the apostle Paul has written back to them and told them, hey, listen, now that you profess Jesus Christ as Lord and your saints in Christ and God has a purpose for you, I want to let you know there's a certain way that God wants you to live. And what we've just come out of in chapters five and the first part of six was Paul began to tell them about, what do we do when there's someone in the church who's unrepentant, not people that sin or the church couldn't exist, but unrepentant, blatant, willful, ongoing, unapologetic sin. And I don't care. You can't tell me what to do. What do we do with people like that?

And we spent a whole week on that, and then we spent a week talking about, hey, as Christians, because we're part of the body of Christ, don't drag people into the courts, don't take people to secular courts to solve your spiritual problems. Deal with it in the church. God gave wisdom to the church. And now what Paul's going to address is that the reason is, is because our bodies are part of the body of Christ. And specifically what he's going to address is sexual immorality and what sexual purity should look like in a church, what christians should live like and, and throughout the rest of this chapter.

In one corinthians six, starting in verse twelve through the end, there's really four things that we want to highlight that you should know about your sexuality and how God created and designed it and wants it to be. And the real reason that we need to take a look at this is much like it was 2000 years ago. There's still a lot of people today, christians that call themselves by the name of the Lord Jesus, that don't understand what God's design is, how he created it, why he created it and what its purpose is for. And so I hope that your, your heart is open and ready to receive everything that the Lord has for you. This morning.

In one Corinthians chapter six, starting in verse twelve, Paul has just finished by talking about what some of them used to be and how God had cleansed them through the gospel of Jesus Christ and his shed blood. And now he says this, all things are lawful for me, but not all things are profitable. All things are lawful for me, but I will not be mastered by anything. Food is for the stomach and the stomach is for food, but God will do away with both of them. Yet the body is not for immorality, but for the Lord, and the Lord is for the body.

Now when Paul starts establishing what he's going to establish, the first thing he's going to say, the first of four things we're going to highlight is when it comes to human sexuality, God created something more beautiful and liberating than self gratification. When it comes to your sexuality, God created something far more beautiful and far more liberating than self gratification. Now, Paul's just got done spelling out the gospel. In one corinthians 611, he talks about those who live a certain way won't inherit the kingdom and such as some of you were, but you've been washed, you've been sanctified, you've been justified, you've been set apart. And if you really understand the gospel, I mean, if you really understand that Jesus Christ died for all of your sins and that he shed his blood for all of your sins, and that he got up out of the grave.

When you confess him as your lord and savior, here's what you can know for sure. You're his and no one can snatch you from his hand, and no sin will be counted against you, because Jesus Christ has forgiven it all. And if the gospel is really proclaimed in its fullness, there will always be people that say, well, then, what if I just continue to sin? Well, those are forgiven too. But what happens is, in the church, if you're really gonna walk with God, that's not how you should continue to live.

I mean, Paul wrote the whole chapter in romans six about, what shall we say? Shall we go on sinning? So grace will abound all the more. And the answer is, may it never be. Heck no.

I mean, why would we want to keep living in the very thing that killed us? Why would we want to keep sinning? The same sin that kept us in bondage, we've been set free. And so what you'll hear sometimes, especially when it comes to sexuality, people that aren't not living for the Lord and people that are living carnal, here's what they'll say. They'll say things like this, well, God forgives me anyway.

I mean, he always forgives us anyway. I can do whatever I want because I'm already going to heaven and I'm already forgiven. When you hear someone talk like that, you can be assured that that person is not walking in the fullness of the Holy Spirit and what God has designed for them. God wants them to walk in the fullness of his spirit. God wants you to walk in the fullness of his spirit.

And so Paul starts this section when it comes to sexuality and talking about how your body is important. He says, all things are lawful for me, but not all things are profitable. All things are lawful for me, but I will not be mastered by anything. In other words, he's saying this, you're slaves to the ones that you obey. People are saying this, hey, Paul, isn't it true that I can still sin and go to heaven?

He's like, yeah, all things are lawful, but not all things are what profitable means advantageous. It means beneficial. It means helpful to you. Just because you can, quote, be forgiven for something doesn't mean that. That something that you do is actually helpful to you or helpful to others or advantageous to you or beneficial to others.

And so the lens that we should be looking at is not what can I do and get away with and still go to heaven? The lens I should be looking with is, if I'm really God's and if I really belong to him, how can I live my life in such a way that things that I do are profitable and beneficial for me as a kingdom citizen? What does that look like? Cause Paul said, yeah, all things are lawful. I mean, you're still going to heaven, but it doesn't mean that they're beneficial.

It doesn't mean that they're profitable. And then he says this, all things are lawful, but I will not be, what? Mastered by anything. In other words, you are slaves to the one that you obey. If you are a slave to your sin, that's what's controlling you.

If you're a slave of the Lord Jesus Christ, he's the one who's controlling you. And especially when it comes to your sexuality, if you engage in sexual sin, it will control you. There's a controlling nature. And so Paul's saying, yeah, even though I'm going to heaven and even though I can sin any sin and still be saved, it doesn't mean it's benefiting me. It doesn't mean that Jesus is excited about it.

It doesn't mean that it's advancing the kingdom. It doesn't mean that it's giving me hope and freedom. So I don't want to do that. And just because things are lawful, I don't want to be controlled by anyone other than Jesus. I want to know that Jesus is my source, that Jesus is my lord.

And what Paul's saying, hey, listen, when it comes to your sexuality, what God designs way more beautiful and liberating than simply your self gratification. Now, why does he talk like that? Notice verse 13. This was probably a slogan in Corinth. Food is for the stomach and the stomach is for food.

But God will do away with both of them. What are they saying? Food for the stomach and the stomach for food. In other words, when I'm physically hungry and I have a physical appetite, I feed it. That's why my stomach's there.

Therefore, I conclude, when I have sexual desire, I just fulfill it any way that I want to. Cause this is my body. And Paul's saying wrong. Notice what he says in the very next verse, in the very next section of that verse. Yet the body is not for immorality, but the Lord and the Lord for the body.

In other words, this, your body, belongs to Jesus. He's the one who gave you your body, especially those of us who have confessed Jesus Christ as Lord. It's not just this tent that we live in. See, the Greeks had the idea that the body didn't mean anything, that spirituality was something within feel. It's what we own, it's what we know.

But as a Christian, we believe in the resurrection of the dead, that we will have physical body someday. What you look at, what you touch, what you taste, it's all spiritual. And so you can't just say, well, that's just the body. I just eat. And, you know, if I feel like having sex, I'll just have sex any way I want, whatever pleases me.

No, no, no. Because your body does not belong to you. Your body belongs to the Lord. Your body was made to honor the Lord. And what God designed in sexuality is way more beautiful and liberating than any type of self gratification.

So let me give you the biblical version of why God designed sex and what it's all about, so that as we get into these passages, we have a framework. If you go back in your Bible to Genesis chapter one, the very first chapter, there's a few things that God points out in Genesis chapter one and verse 27. He says God created man in his own image. In the image of God, he created him. Male and female, he created them.

A couple things you need to know, okay? Especially you animal lovers. I mean, I love that you love your dog. I love that you love your cat. You were created in the image of God, your dog and your cat was not.

Your cat may think he is, but he's not. Okay? You were created in the image of God. You are above them. That's why God in the next verse says, to be fruitful and multiply and have dominion over the earth.

But God created two genders. Psalm 139, verses 13 and 14 says that you form my inmost parts, that you created me. And what did he create? He created two genders. He created male and female.

I want to let you know something. If you were born male, that's who you are. That's what God intended. If you were born female, that's what you are. That's what God intended.

And both are to be celebrated if you're female. Here's the truth. Celebrate your femininity. It's honoring to God that you would celebrate your femininity. If you're male, celebrate your masculinity.

It is honoring to God that you would celebrate your masculinity. Now we live in a society. I just want to tell you, this may come as a shock that everybody thinks that gender is the same and that the only differences are anatomical. Can I just tell you that's so not true. I mean, just watch kids.

I mean, watch how your little boy is versus how your little girl is. They're different. They're hardwired different. In utero, you were different. That's why when I talk to married couples and we're doing counseling, Kim and I are doing counseling, and they'll say stuff like this, well, we have communication problems.

Duh. She's a female, you're a male. You don't even see the world the same way, let alone your family backgrounds, let alone your upbringing, let alone your life experiences. Of course you have communication problems. Right?

Femininity. Beautiful. Masculinity. Beautiful to be celebrated the way God wants it to be celebrated. Okay, so that's what he designed.

Now, notice if you flip over to Genesis two, you'll see the first wedding. In Genesis, chapter 218, we see this. The Lord God said, it is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him. Now, this is a really cool statement.

Number one, God says, it's not good for man to be alone. Amen. I think it's a good thing that man is not alone. Now, what has Adam been doing all day? This day?

He's been naming animals, like, all day. Like lion. Okay, bear. I'm coming. Platypus.

I mean, he's just coming up with names all day. But one thing he's noticing is that for every male bear, there's a female bear, and for every male lion, there's a female lion. And for every male dog, there's a female dog. But for Adam, no suitable helper was found. And God tells him, it's not good for you to be alone either.

So God causes Adam to fall into a deep sleep, takes a rib from Adam, and fashions a woman and brings her to him. He's coming up out of a nap when he notices Eve. And this is what he says. The man said, this is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh. She shall be called woman because she was taken out of man.

Now, I don't know how many of you guys listen to the audio bible. There's some really good audio bibles out there. There's a guy named Max McClain that does the ESV with this voice like James Earl Jones. And it's really cool. If you hear this read, it'll say something like this.

Adam saw her, and the man said, I can't do it like that. But this is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh. She shall be called woman, for she was taken out of man. That is not what Adam said. That's not how Adam said it.

I mean, guys, picture this. All day long you've been naming animals and you're tired, and God says, it's not good for you to be alone. And you take a nap, and at the end of the nap, you wake up and there's a beautiful naked girl standing right next to you. And God says, this is for you. You would not say, this is now bone of my bone.

That's not what you would say. Adam's like, this is bone of my bones and flesh in my flesh. Whoa, man. That's how you got woman, right? So that's what's going on.

And God says it's a good thing and it's a beautiful thing. And the very next two verses, you see the first marriage, because that's exactly what happens. For this reason, a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. That's what marriage is in the Bible. According to the Bible, it's one man and one woman joined together, covenant before God till death do they part.

That's what God sanctions. God sanctions nothing else. That's what marriage is. Okay? And notice this in verse 25.

And the man and his wife were both naked and not ashamed. How awesome is that? See, we're ashamed of sex in our culture. As a matter of fact, sometimes in church, we won't even talk about it because we think it's a bad thing. And some of you grew up in environments where sex is really, really, really, really bad.

And then you get married and you're supposed to, like, flip a switch. No, it's good now. Okay. And some of you grew up in environments like, hey, just do whatever you want. I mean, you're probably not going to make it till you get married anyway.

I mean, it's the right thing to do, but you probably can't handle it, you know, have sex. But be careful out there. I mean, usually one of those two environments, God's environment looks like this. No, here's the environment. Sex is so powerful.

It's so good. I created it. It's so binding. It is what it is. That marriage is the only container.

And outside of marriage, no sex inside marriage, as frequent as you want to have it because it's so binding. That's God's design for sexuality. And God says it's good. As a matter of fact, on that day where he created male and female and wrapped everything up. At the end of Genesis 131, he says God saw all that he had made and said it was very good.

Like, God's a big fan of marriage, and God's not embarrassed to talk about sexuality. As a matter of fact, we'll talk about this a little more next week. I mean, God dedicated an entire book in the Bible to sexuality called the song of songs. I mean, if you just want to read through that, I mean, just at a glance. I mean, Hollywood wouldn't even get an r rating in that book if they just gave it in all of its fullness, right?

I mean, why? Because God's not embarrassed about what he created. We may be, but God's not. Adam and Eve were both together naked, and they were not ashamed. I mean, even throughout the Bible, we see different places where God talks about sexuality.

He's not embarrassed at all. I mean, in proverbs 518 and 19, here's what he says about the marriage relationship. Let your fountain be blessed and rejoice in the wife of your youth as a loving hind and a graceful doe. Let her breasts satisfy you at all times. Be exhilarated always with her love.

Does that sound like a God that's embarrassed about sexuality? I'm gonna tell you that he's not. And sex is good, and it's very good, and God intended it to be very good, but he gave a container of marriage for it to be good. And outside of that, there's pain. Inside of that, it's really good.

We'll talk about that a little bit today. And when God created it, he created it more beautiful and liberating than self gratification. I mean, even if you think about the entire Bible, I mean, when one guy came to Jesus one day, an attorney, to test him, and said, hey, how would you sum up the law and the prophets? He said, simple. Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength, and love your neighbor as yourself.

That pretty much sums up the entirety of the Bible. Go vertical and give God glory and praise. And then as he fills you with his love, go serve others relentlessly. I mean, that's really what the Bible is all about, right? In a nutshell, that's what we're called to do.

Did you know that's how God designed sexuality, too? God designed sexuality to be between a husband and a wife that would glorify and worship God and give him everything they have. And then sex is all about serving one another. It's all about giving to one another. It's not about gratification.

It's not about, hey, what do I get out of this whole thing? It's not about what do I get? It's about how do I give? Now, if that's God's definition of sex, then anything that falls shy of glorifying God and serving one another in a marital relationship, to make sure your spouse is pleasured and satisfied, everything else that falls shy of that is sin. Can you think about all the sins in the world?

Everything that falls shy of that is sin. If you're living together, sin. If you're just in high school or college or you're just kind of hanging out and you're just checking each other out and you're sleeping together, it's sin. Looking at porn, it's sin, right? Union.

That's not between a man and a woman sin. I mean, it's all sin. And the Bible says this, did you know this? All have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. When it comes to the way that God designs sexuality, none of us on our own, apart from the Holy Spirit, can ever live this out.

And I'm just here to tell you that you can live out everything that God demands through the power of the Holy Spirit. I mean, that's what Paul's going to tell the corinthian people right now, because if you're sitting here, and I know what it was like, I mean, if you're a 16 year old dude sitting here right now and your hormones are raging, you're like, dude, I got to wait till I'm like 20 something to get married. What am I going to do with all this? And where am I going to get the power? Paul's so glad that you ask, and so am I.

Look at verse 14. I'll give you the second design for God's sexuality. When it comes to your sexuality, God will empower his design and will hold you personally accountable. God will give you the power and the strength that you need, and you will give an answer for your sexuality one day. Notice verse 14.

Now, God has not only raised the Lord, but will also raise us up through his. I want to let you know something. We believe in the resurrection of the dead. As Christians, one day your body will be resurrected. You will stand before the Lord to give an account for your life.

Hebrews 927 says, it is appointed unto man to die once, and after that, face judgment, you will stand before the Lord. Two Corinthians 510 says, we all must appear before the judgment seat of Christ to give an account for everything, you will appear before the Lord. But even better news than that, this same God that raised Jesus Christ from the dead, the same power is available in and through us when we've trusted in Jesus Christ. When the Holy Spirit is resident in your life, you have the power of God to live out everything that God would ever demand. You just do.

Now the world will tell you you can't. The world will tell you this. Hey, if you're 16, there's no way you're going to stay a virgin until you're married. Here's what you need. Here, just take condoms.

I'll just pass out condoms. That's not what the Bible says. What the Bible says is, through the power of the Holy Spirit, you can live out what God wants you to have. And you can do it in God's way. What the Bible says is, with the holy spirit resident inside of you, you don't need to have lustful thoughts for other women because I'll hear guys say stuff like this.

It's okay that I look, but I just don't want to touch. Seriously, ask your wife if she's cool with that. Ask God if he's cool with that, because he's not. Well, you say, well, how do I get over lust? You submit to God and God's strength is perfected in your weakness when you can confess to the Lord, hey, God, I can't do this thing.

I can't live this thing. I can't live pure like you're asking. But you say that I can. So I need your help in my life to do this very thing. And God always empowers his children who are depending on upon him.

It's a fact. You can live a pure life. God has the power to do that in the same way that he raises you up. And just think about this. I mean, so often we don't apply certain scriptures to sexuality, but in Galatians 522, we talk about the fruit of the spirit, you know, that nine sectioned fruit.

But think about it as it relates to sexuality. I mean, when you do it God's way and you abstain from sex until you're married, and then insect in marriage, you have God honoring sexuality. What is the result of that first one? Love. Love.

Can I just pause there for a second because I feel like I need to share this as your pastor because I love you so much. Ladies, listen to me. If you're dating a guy that says, hey, the reason we're doing this is this just shows that you love me. Let me tell you something. If you're engaging in sex outside your marriage, he doesn't love you.

He just doesn't love you. If the guy's saying, hey, sex is the way to say, thanks for a great date, don't even get worried. Just say, no. That's not how it works. Here's how it would be.

Thanks for me. Why don't you come vacuum my carpet and clean my dishes and clean my house and do my laundry? And that would show more love to me than sex would, right? Love? There is no love sexually outside of marriage, period.

End of story. No such thing. Yeah, but we were living together, and he told me. He told me if I break up with him, he's not going to marry me. Let me tell you something.

He ain't ever going to marry you. I mean, it's kind of like the old saying goes, why buy the cow if you get the milk for free? You know what I'm saying? I mean, here's the purpose. You live pure before God.

Now you might be saying, well, if I live pure before God, how am I ever gonna meet my spouse? The same way Eve did. God brought Eve to the man. Guys, how are you gonna meet your spouse? God will bring the woman right in your path if you're glorifying and honoring him.

That's what he does. So as you're thinking about this, the enemy will always lie to you and say, it's not gonna happen to you. There are no other virgins out there but you. You're never gonna have a good marriage. You might as well give in now.

You might. I mean, I heard all those same thoughts, the same way you're hearing all those thoughts. They're lies. The truth is that you can live pure and experience the blessing of sexuality in marriage, just the way God defined. And now a word for the guys.

Cause I know we live in a day and age where it's not chic to be a virgin until you're married, but God thinks it is. And if you want a blessing on your marriage, remain a virgin until you're married. And if you say, well, I've already blown that, then start today and repent. And from this moment on, live for the glory of God. Amen.

That's what he would say. And where am I going to get the power to do that? The same power that raised Jesus from the dead? Cause that's the kind of power that you're going to need to live for God. But God will empower his design, and he'll hold you personally accountable to it.

We're going to give an answer for how we lived in this body. Let me give you a third thing. When it comes to your sexuality, God designed a union. He designed a union in sexuality that becomes either wonderfully satisfying or incredibly painful. He designed a union in sexuality that becomes either wonderfully satisfying or incredibly painful.

Now, three different times, we're going to see it. The rest of this section. Do you not know? Do you not know? Do you not know?

Cause Paul's talking to them about, if you really understood God and you really understood your body, you would know this, but you really don't. So do you not know? Corinthians, check this out. Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ? Hey, harvest.

Do you not know that when you trusted in Christ for the forgiveness of your sins, that you became part of the body of Christ, and that your body, your physical body, represents Christ, Christ on planet earth. And how you live is marking you or making a distinction for how you live the gospel out? Do you not know that? I mean, you are part of the body of Christ. When you trust in Christ and notice what he says, shall I then take away the members of Christ and make them members of a prostitute?

May it never be. In other words, if Christ is in you, when you go join yourself to someone else, you're taking Jesus with you. The question is, is Jesus having as much fun in this experience as you are? Now? Here's the question.

Why is Paul talking about prostitutes in church? Let me tell you why. Because clearly in the first century, there were some men that were in the church that were married, that were living with their wives, that had their marriage relationship that was kept pure, but they had some things on the side going on to make sure their sex life could be fulfilled. And there were clearly men in the church that were visiting prostitutes. Can you believe that happened in the first century?

Can you believe that there were actually men in church that were married that were getting their sexual fulfillment from somebody other than their wife? It happens all the time. I've been in ministry for 25 years. It happens all the time. There are some of you that are listening to my voice right now.

It's you. I'm talking to you. You know I'm talking to you. You're married. Your wife doesn't know, but she probably does know and just doesn't want to know.

But you know that you have an extramarital relationship out here and it's not honoring to God, and you know it's not honoring to God, but you continue in it, and it's going on. And the reason you're not getting up and leaving right now, even though you want to, is because you know if you got up right now, it would be like, oh, it's him, right? That's why some of you are like, I have to go to the bathroom really bad right now, but there's no way I'm leaving my seat, right? That was going on then. It goes on now.

And Paul was telling them, you got to understand something. The very next verse, he tells them, here's what happens when you join yourself to a prostitute. Or do you not know that the one who joins himself to the prostitute is one body with her? For he says, and he quotes Genesis 224, the two shall become one flesh. Every time there's a sexual union, there's a oneness that's created whether you want it or not.

Why? Because sex is more than physical. Sex is a spiritual act that God designed to create oneness between a husband and a wife. And if you use that in a way outside of marriage, it still creates a oneness. You still become one flesh with the person that you engaged in sex with, even though you didn't intend to or even though you didn't want to.

And that's why there's such pain in sex outside of marriage, because you just became one flesh with that person. It's not physical. It's spiritual. It's emotional. It's mental.

And God is binding something together, right? That's why sexual sin hurts more than any other kind of sin. That's why you can't get rid of it. That's why it hurts so bad. I mean, I tell a story about a time several years ago.

I was at Disneyland, which is kind of one of my most unfavorite places on the planet. And it was about 100 degrees one day, and I was walking, and we were out with our family. And to add insult to injury, just happened to step in some warm chewing gum, kind of the one where you take the next step and the whole thing follows you, you know? And it was there. And I'm like, oh, you got to be kidding me.

And I went and I sat down. I tried to scrape it off. I couldn't get it all off. I mean, I couldn't get off. It was like a quarter sized piece of gum stuck to the bottom of my sandal.

And to make matters worse, since I couldn't get off, it just got more dirty. It just collected dirt with the stick on the gum. And everywhere I walked for the rest of the week, I was like, oh, my God. Gosh. Stepping in gum, stepping in gum.

I could feel it on every single step because some of the gum stuck and I couldn't get it off. That's what sexual sin is. Like, some of the gum sticks, you have sex outside your marriage, you have sex before you get into a marriage, and some of the gum sticks, and no matter what you do, you can't wrestle it off. You can't pry it off, you can't pray it. It's just there.

And there ain't nothing I can do about it. And that's why some of you here, who have even been married for a period of time, you look back on your dating life and you're like, why did I do what I did? If I could go back and hit a rewind switch, there's no way I would have done it this way, right? Some of you that are married wished that your husband would have been different prior to you getting married. And, hey, why didn't you honor me enough?

And why didn't you do this stuff enough? Because some of the gum stuck. The gum always sticks. Like, you can't just say, well, that's never going to happen to me, and I'm okay, and I can get by with it. No, some of the gum will stick, and there's always pain.

When the gum sticks, there's always pain. I mean, I was going to do a little construction paper project. I practiced it in my office about three times. It didn't work, but I was going to glue construction paper together during my sermon and then rip it apart and show you what it looks like. You know, just have little fragmented pieces.

And this person you don't even want to be connected to anymore that you weren't intending to marry anyway. You still feel this gum because it's stuck. And you're like, what do I do now? And I wish I could go back to what it was before, but I can't. Why?

Because sex is way more powerful than physical, and our world doesn't know that, right? And I know there's some of you here that are challenging me on it. I mean, I'm a guy. I mean, I get it. I haven't always been a pastor.

I know what some of you are saying. Like, that's his opinion, it's not my opinion, it's God's opinion. And he's right, and he's true in everything. But for some of you, like, no, I can do whatever I want. I can sleep with my girlfriend, we're probably going to get married anyway.

And it's no big deal. And I get away with it, and I don't see any pain coming. And I've been doing this for five years, and it's not a big deal. Here's how I describe it to you. You're missing out on the fullness of everything God has.

Let me give you an example. I remember when I was four or five for Christmas, I got a big wheel. Remember what those big wheel things were? Had two little wheels in the back and one big wheel in the front. That's why they called it a big wheel.

And it had a steering column, and it had a seat. So it had everything you needed to go where you needed to go. And at age four and five, it was really cool. I get up and down my driveway. I get to my neighbor's house.

I mean, I was pretty jazzed about my big wheel. Now I'm older, now I have a truck. I'm not all that jazzed about a big wheel anymore. Now, my truck still has a steering column, my truck still has a seat, and my truck still has wheels. But it can do things that my big wheel couldn't do.

I could talk on the phone through bluetooth in my truck. I could sit comfortably going 80 miles an hour in my truck. Not that you're supposed to do that. Normally, it's 65, but I can sit comfortably in it doing those things, right, because there's so much more to my truck than there was to my big wheel. So here's what I say to you.

They say, no, I'm fooling around. I'm doing whatever. All you're doing is saying, I got a really nice big wheel. Because I want to tell you something. Despite what the world tells you, sexual fidelity inside a marriage is all that and a bag of chips.

It's the way God designed it. God gave us this gift. God said, it's good. We're going to talk about it next week in detail. It's what he wanted for us.

Do you know that? And I'm just telling you, those of you who aren't married yet, those of you who want to be married, I mean, take these words to heart, put them into practice. You will have good friends that are like, I agree with this. I agree with this. And you'll watch them go a different way, and you'll feel like you're all alone.

But I'm telling you, if you'll hold to God's word by your wedding day, and you get married and you're honoring God, you will say thank you. Thank you. Thank you, Pastor Jeff. You were so right. God honored this.

You can't mess with this stuff. It just works. It's true. Verse 17. But the one who joins himself to the Lord is one in spirit with him.

You're one with Christ. You're one with Christ. So the question to ask is not, can I get away with this? Am I having fun because I'm one with Christ? I'm praying.

I'm saying, jesus, are you getting glory out of this? Are you being honored by this? Are you blessed? By the way I'm living out my sexuality and say, well, how do I know what his answer is? Read it in the word.

And if it boils down to honoring God and serving your spouse with everything, you have to bring pleasure and honor and joy to him or her, then the answer is yes. And if it's not, it's sinful. Let it go. That's God's design. And it can become wonderfully satisfying or incredibly painful.

I mean, God designed it in a marriage for a man and a woman to have an incredibly satisfying sexual life that gets better and better. And let me just tell you this, because I'll probably expand on this next week a lot, because here's what you hear in the world. Hey, have as much sex as you want now, because when you get married, you know, people aren't into that anymore. Plus, you can be, like, old and it's just not going to work anymore and all this kind of stuff, it's a big lie, according to the Bible. And I would tell you by personal experience, it gets better and better and better and better.

And I got people 30 years my senior that would tell you the exact same thing. Right? It's God's design for sex, and it's good. As a matter of fact, he says it's very good. Now, I do have to pause here for a minute because I realize after being a pastor for some 25 years, I know this to be the case.

I know it, and I'm sorry that this is the case. Some of you are sitting here listening to this message and saying, yeah, I'm hearing this one flesh thing, but I was six years old when that happened to me and I didn't want that. And now what do I do? Because now you're telling me I'm one flesh with my dad, with my coach, with my pastor, with my teacher off in the background. I mean, what the heck was that?

I didn't ask for that. And I just want to tell you something 100% wrong. And there's 100% healing for what God can do in your life. And I'm going to show you in a minute how God can take care of that and God can heal you because I know it's true. Because some of you girls, you were raped, and some of you girls weren't honored by the men that you dated, and some of you girls thought you were going to be honored by the men that you dated, but they didn't keep their hands off you.

And you kind of thought he was trustworthy, but he wasn't trustworthy. And I want to tell you there's healing for that. And I don't just want to say women because I've done enough counseling to know there's probably 5% of the guys that are here that have dealt with the same kind of thing. I just know it's true and I just want to tell you there's healing and there's hope, and our God is good, and the blood of Jesus on the cross washes away all sin. And I'll show you how that works in just a minute.

But this is a big deal. That's why it's wonderfully satisfying or it's incredibly painful. I mean, I don't know how many times I've sat down in a counseling office and one of the spouses, before they got married, wanted to talk to me. Hey, right before we go to the altar, I gotta tell you something because I just gotta get this off my chest because here's some things in my life that my spouse doesn't even know about yet, and here's what's going on. And I'm dying on the inside, right?

Cause what? Cause they didn't do it God's way. That's why I love what God gives us instruction to do in the last three verses. It's what you need to understand about your sexuality. God delights in you when you flee immorality and when you glorify him.

God will delight in you when you flee immorality and you glorify him. Notice how verse 18 starts. Just two simple words, flee immorality. You know what flee means? It means run away as fast as you stink and can.

It means get away from this stuff. Why? Because you can't play around with sexual temptation and not get burned. It's like playing with fire and saying, I'm not going to get burned. I'll just look a little bit on the Internet.

It'll have you before you even know it. We'll just talk on the phone. I mean, I'm not going to really pursue her. We're just going to be friends and share our hearts with one another. It's not going to work.

And, ladies, let me just tell you something, because I. I say this to our men's ministry all the time. I just want you to know, as your pastor, I want to love you as your pastor. I want to care for you as your pastor. I'm here for you as your pastor.

Even Kim and I will meet with you. But I want to make something really clear. We're never going to be best friends, okay? Like, my wife's my best friend, so she gets all my emotions. She gets all my heart.

We're not going to go out and have coffee together or dinner. We're not going to text together unless my wife's on the script. We're not going to email unless my wife's on the. Why? Because I don't want to be one of those, like several of my colleagues have been.

They have to stand in front of a church on a Sunday morning and say, listen, I'm no longer your pastor. There's something I need to tell you. I've been having a sexual relationship outside of my marriage and I disqualified myself as your pastor. So pray for me, pray for my family, and pray for the next pastor. But see you later.

I would rather have a stake driven through my heart than to ever have to do that. I want to live with integrity in such a way I never have to do that. So it's not like I walk around and I'm, like, scared. But I want to set healthy boundaries for my marriage because I love my wife so much and I love Christ church so much, then I never have to worry about it, right? That's what we want to do as a staff.

I'm just telling you, flee immorality. About the only good story in the Bible is Joseph, right? I mean, when he flees immorality from Potiphar's wife, and what happens? He ends up going to prison for three years in Genesis 39. Because why?

Because he goes in and she's like, hey, come lie with me. He's like, I'm out of here. And he ran so fast, he left his coat and she's like, look it. He came in to have sex with me. And when I screamed, he dropped his coat and ran.

She lied and he ends up in prison for three years. But you know what God did? God honored him and put him second in charge. God will always honor your fidelity sexually to him, right? Because it belongs to him.

Flee sexual immorality. Don't toy with it. Well, I thought we were just going to be friends. We just had dinner. Our families just vacationed together.

I mean, it was just this. I mean, I've heard that story probably over a thousand times. If I would have only known that my spouse was feeling this way about his spouse or he was feeling that way about her spouse, I mean, I just would have never done this. Just don't have conversations outside your marriage that your spouse doesn't know about. That's a really healthy thing to do.

Flee immorality. Why? Because every other sin that a man commits is outside his body. But the immoral man sins against his own body. There's no sin quite as painful as sexual sin.

That's what he's saying. In other words, there's no sin that's too great to be forgiven. You can be forgiven from any sin, but there is a pain that comes out of sexual sin that goes deeper and wounds harder than any other kind of sin. That's what sexual sin does. You're sinning against yourself when you sin sexually.

You're actually hurting yourself when you sin sexually. That's why he says, don't do that. Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit? There you go. We're the church.

Your body is a temple where the spirit of God dwells, who is in you, whom you have from God. And guess what? And that you're not your own. Did you know you're not your own? I mean, if you've trusted in Christ, you don't belong to you anymore.

You belong to Jesus. Notice what verse 20 says. For you have been bought with a price. Therefore glorify God in your body. You don't belong to yourself.

You belong to God. For what purpose? To glorify him. With what? With my body.

With everything that I have. I'm called to glorify God, right? That's what I'm called to do. And that's what God wants you to do. Flee immorality and glorify him, and you'll have the delight of the Lord.

And there's nothing more exciting than having God being for you in everything. That's who our God is. Now, I'm telling you, when I preach a message like this, I mean, I've thought about this message all week because I knew. I've known I was going to preach this message for a long time. Because I know what's coming.

Because we're a bible church and we kind of go word by word, verse by verse. I know. I'm preaching on sex and marriage next week. So you want to come back and be a part of that? Because I'll tell you things that the world's not telling you.

But at the end of the day, I also know that when I'm preaching this message, there's some of you that are saying this. I wish I would have heard this message 25 years ago. I wish I would have heard this message five months ago. Hey. I wish I would have heard this message before last night.

Hey. Because here's what I understand, Jeb. I know God forgives me, but I feel so lousy on the inside. I know there are several of you that feel that way. So let me give you an illustration.

I mean, it's kind of like this. Imagine this pure water representing your heart, and this red food coloring just representing sexual sin. And let's just say, I mean, just a couple drops. Because that's about all it takes for sexual sin to start marring the inside of your heart. You shake that around a little bit.

I mean, here's the deal. Here's how some of you feel right now. You would say, I know Jesus has forgiven me. I know that I'm his. But this is how I feel on the inside.

I feel awful. This was robbed for me when I was a little girl. This was robbed for me, for my family. This was robbed from me when I was younger. If I would have only known this when I dated, I would never have gone down.

This is how I feel. And if I could just hit rewind. I mean, I know that I'm loved, but this is how I feel. I feel so icky on the inside. I know that several of you here today, but that's the good news.

You are bought with a price. Can I tell you what the price is? The price was the blood and body of Jesus Christ. He shed his blood to forgive all your sins. And forgiveness is not just a, hey, yeah, it's forgiven, but you can live with the scar.

Here's what forgiveness looks like. Like, if this represents Christ, it looks kind of like this. The more you allow the spirit of Christ to be poured into your life, here's what happens. It kind of goes like this.

Jesus takes what is scarlet, and he makes it white as snow again. Isn't that awesome?

Which means this. If you trusted in Jesus, you don't walk out of here with your head down, and you don't walk out of here in shame. And you don't walk out of here and say, I'm an adulterer. You don't walk out of here and say, I used to be this. You walk out of here and you say this.

I am cleansed by the blood of Jesus. I am a new creation. The old is gone. The new has come. This is who I am in Christ.

And from this moment on, I'm going to live the way God wants me to live. See, some of us, because of our shame and living in our past with our sexual sin, we say stuff like this. Well, I already went down this road. I guess I got to marry him now. I already went down this road.

I might as well keep having sex now. I already went down this road. I'm already used goods now. No, you're not. You are a child of the most high God.

And when you repent and confess, you are cleansed. You are clean. And from this moment on, you can live for the glory of God right here in this place. Onward till you meet him face to face. Isn't that good news?

It's better than a rewind switch. It's a cleansing power of our Lord Jesus Christ. And that's who you are in him. So, as we end our service today, I'm going to have you stand here in a minute, and we're just going to pray. And I don't know how you need to pray.

I don't know what you need to confess, but I'll tell you this, because we've all sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. There is not one person in this room that's been through puberty that would say, I've lived perfect. Not one. All have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. And regardless of the number of sins and regardless of the intensity of the sin at the cross of Jesus, all can be forgiven.

Amen. And you can walk out of this place a new creation, with the old being gone and the new coming. So would you stand with me as we pray before we sing Lord Jesus, in this place, you're doing a work. And, Lord, I just pray by the power of your holy spirit right now. As silently sins are confessed before you, Lord, that you would just flood through, that you would wash through, that you would cleanse us by your blood again in a new and fresh way, that we might be pure and spotless vessels for you.

Lord, honor your word here today. Let us live for you in every way. We give you all the glory and praise in Jesus name. Amen.